LAW AND COMEDY

JOKE 1
THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A GOOD LAWYER AND A BAD LAWYER

A bad lawyer can let a case drag out for several years. A good lawyer can make it last even longer.

The lawyer's son wanted to follow in his father's footsteps, so he went to law school and graduated with honors. Then he went home to join his father's firm.
At the end of his first day at work, he rushed into his father's office and said, "Father, father! In one day I broke the Smith case that you've been working on for so long!"
His father yelled, "You idiot! We've been living on the funding of that case for ten years!"

JOKE 2
LAWYER AND MONEY
A lawyer e-mailed a client: “Dear Jennifer: Thought I saw you on the street the other day. Crossed over to say hello, but it wasn’t you, so I went back. One tenth of an hour, your fee is $30.”

JOKE 3
STUPID QUESTIONS LAWYERS ASK
Attorney: "How was your first marriage terminated?"
Witness: "By death."
Attorney: "And by whose death was it terminated?"
Witness: "Guess."

Attorney: "Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?"
Witness: "All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight."

JOKE 4
STUPID CLIENTS

I was in juvenile court, prosecuting a teen suspected of burglary, when the judge asked everyone to stand and state his or her name and role for the court reporter.
"Leah Rauch, deputy prosecutor," I said.
"Linda Jones, probation officer."
"Sam Clark, public defender."
"John," said the teen who was on trial. "I’m the one who stole the truck."